Sloppy Joe Burritos

I got home from work at 4:00 on Friday.  I had to turn around and pick up a rental car while the kids car was being fixed.  My oldest parked it on the street at a friend’s house last Wed, and someone ran into the back.  Fortunately, they stopped and left their number so their insurance is paying for the repair.

I asked my oldest to give me a ride to the rental place.  I knew my wife would be drunk so she couldn’t drive.  I was right.  When I walked in the house I saw her sitting on the couch drunk.  She was holding a water bottle and as soon as I walked in she put it down on the floor.  I figured it was full of vodka but I didn’t do or say anything.  She asked if she could go with us to pick up the car and I thought to myself, sure, that’s what I need, a drunk person with me at the rental car place.  I told her to stay home and the oldest and I went and got the car.

It took a while to get the car.  By the time I got home, she had cooked dinner.  She made sloppy joes but didn’t cook them long enough so it was kind of like soup.  We didn’t have buns so she decided to improvise and make them burritos.  She put out cheese, lettuce and sour cream with a plate of flour tortillas.  Just the thought was disgusting.

The kids came in from the living room and looked at it and said “We’re not eating that”.  Their mother got upset and said something about how she can never plan dinners and left to go pass out in the back bedroom.  I told the kids that’s what were having for dinner and they just went back to the living room.

I was looking through the pantry for something to give the kids and found her water bottle hidden in a storage basket.  I opened it up and discovered it wasn’t water, it was vodka.   Guess I was right.  There was nothing to eat so the kids and I went and got a frozen yogurt.  That was good enough for dinner.